Sometimes it can be difficult to understand why we like this or that person. Maybe it's a charming smile or wit, or maybe you just feel comfortable and easy to be around him, but scientists do not have enough of this answer, and they do a lot of research to determine the factors that attract us to each other.
Here are some interesting tricks to help you look at existing dating in a new light and quickly start a relationship.
1. Copy gestures
When you are talking to someone, try to copy their gestures, body movements, and facial expressions. This strategy is known as mirroring, where you repeat the behavior of another person.
The chameleon effect, which occurs when people unconsciously imitate each other's behavior, and this behavior leads to sympathy.
2. Spend more time with the people you want to meet.
We usually like the people we know. To demonstrate this phenomenon, psychologists conducted an experiment in which four women were to be present in the classroom as female students. Each of the women appeared in the class a different number of times.
When male students were shown photographs of four women, they expressed great sympathy for the women they saw more often, although they did not interact with them.
People will associate you with the words you use to describe other people.
In other words, whatever you say about other people affects how you are seen. If you talk about others as sincere and kind people, you are associated with these qualities. The opposite is also true, if you constantly throw mud at someone behind your back, you will be associated with negative traits.
4. Express positive emotions
People are strongly influenced by the mood of other people, and we subconsciously feel the emotions of those around us.
Perhaps this is because we naturally copy the movements and facial expressions of others, which helps us to feel the same as others.
If you want other people to be happy around you, try to express positive emotions.
5. Be friendly and competent
When you show yourself to be friendly, people feel they can trust you. If you seem competent, they tend to respect you.
Psychologists believe that it is important to first demonstrate your friendliness, and then competence, since from an evolutionary point of view, it is important to know whether a person is trustworthy.
6. Show your shortcomings from time to time.
People tend to love you more after you've made a mistake, but only if they see you as a competent person.
By showing your imperfection, you become more intimate and vulnerable, making it easier for others to get closer to you.
7. Emphasize shared values
We are attracted to those who are like us. In one experiment, people were asked their attitude on various issues, and then asked to live together. By the end of the experiment, people were more attracted to those who had a similar relationship with them on different topics.
Subconscious touch occurs when we touch another person so imperceptibly that he almost does not notice it. Even lightly stroking your back or touching your hand can create a more warm feeling towards you.
When you smile the first time you meet another person, chances are good that they won't forget you.
In one experiment, participants looked at photographs of women in different positions: a smiling woman in open and closed positions, and an unsmiling woman in similar positions. The experiment showed that the participants liked the smiling woman regardless of her posture.
10. Perceive the other as he wanted to be seen.
People want to be perceived the way they perceive themselves. We all want confirmation of our opinion, be it negative or positive.
So if a person thinks highly of himself, he prefers those who also think highly of him, and people with a negative attitude towards themselves prefer those who criticize them. It seems strange, but it is explained by the fact that we like to communicate with those who respond to us with what corresponds to our image of ourselves.
11. Tell a secret
This is one of the best ways to start a relationship. If we talk about very personal issues, we feel much closer to each other than if we talk about trivial questions.
So, for example, when you meet someone, you can start with simple questions, such as asking about the last movie the person saw, and then asking about the people closer to them in their life.
When you share personal information with another person, they feel closer to you and are more likely to trust you.
12. Show that you know how to keep secrets
People place a high value on honesty in a relationship. Honesty, loyalty, and trustworthiness are perhaps the most important ingredients in friendships and relationships.
13. Demonstrate a sense of humor.
No matter what we think of the ideal friend or partner, a sense of humor is important.
By using humor when dating, you greatly increase the chances that you will like the other person, and if you have a funny experience together, it increases the romantic attraction.
14. Let others talk about you
Talking about ourselves gives us as much pleasure as food, money, or sex.
In other words, when you allow the other person to share a story from your life, it creates more positive memories of your interaction.
15. Be a little vulnerable
Emotional openness or closeness often explains why some people converge and some don't.
Of course, emotional openness comes with the risk of becoming vulnerable and the uncertainty that you will be accepted.
However, openness is very important in both friendships and romantic relationships.
16. Show that you like them
When we think we like someone, we tend to like that person too.
If we know that the other person will accept us, we are friendlier to them, increasing the chances that they will really like us.
Even if you are not sure about the other person's feelings, act as if you love them and the chances are great that the feeling will be mutual.