100 iron male rules

1) When you go to a restaurant of national cuisine, choose the one where representatives of this nationality go.

2) If you are late for your connections at the airport, look for Fast Track - a separate line for those who are late for connections - or queue up for business class.

3) If a friend or close person calls you from the police asking for help, you are obliged to do everything in your power.

4) You have the right to kick another man in the groin only if there is a threat to life and health.

5) You have the right to answer “I don’t know” to any question regarding your friend and asked by his wife or girlfriend

6) DO NOT PROMISE TO YOUR CHILD THAT YOU CANNOT DO.

7) Always screw the cap back on the bottle after pouring (drinking).

8) You are obliged to lend a car, screwdriver or any other thing to a friend, if he asked you about it no later than 12 hours in advance.

9) You don't have to be nice or friendly with your girlfriend's husbands or boyfriends.

10) If there is a queue at a single window or door, always look for a second or a machine with the same functions nearby. And just not finding him, join the crowd.

11) On the road, always skip ahead at least truck drivers. Of all the men behind the wheel, they are the least likely to hurt you and the most at risk if you are late.

12) Pizza should be eaten with your hands, taking a piece by the bread crust. Fold a piece in half and fill it with butter if the waiter remembers to serve it.

13) If I provoke your weak or too drunk friend into a fight, you must take his side. But if he runs into it himself, he doesn't have to.

14) Do not argue with sellers, waiters and other staff. In case of conflict, call their boss right away.

15) It is not manly to promise to marry or to say that you love in order to drag a woman into bed.

16) You cannot take a mistress to the company if friends go with their wives. And vice versa.

17) In a boat, do not try to row by bending your arms. Rowing is a series of bends with a straight back and straight arms.

18) Car rule of three "d": give way to the fool.

19) If a shark attacked you, hit it with a bloody stump of hands right on the nose!

20) You must interrupt a drunk friend who is trying to tell you someone else's secret.

21) You have no right to require a woman to talk about her ex.

22) FRIEND'S GIRL IS NOT A GIRL!

23) If the connection is interrupted, the person who originally called will always call back.

24) If you break a borrowed item, you are obliged to fix it or buy a new one.

25) It's not cool not to go to the polls: your unused ballot will serve as stuffing.

26) Always call your friend back if he could not answer.

27) If it is possible not to add salt to food once again, not salt.

28) You are obliged to recognize the thing as rubbish and throw it out if: a) you cannot use it right now b) you haven't used it for at least a year, or c) you have one more thing with the same functions.

29) When shooting from anything, put your weapon on anything and lower the scope a little lower than the rules seem to suggest.

30) Cigarettes must not be lit with gasoline lighters. Cigarettes should not be extinguished by poking them into the bottom of the ashtray. Just put the butt down and let it go out.

31) In a taxi, always sit in the back seat.

32) When doing push-ups, always tuck your shirt into your shorts, otherwise you won't see your belly.

33) Always ask for more money than it is worth for any job.

34) Do not cheat on your wife within a radius of one hundred kilometers from home.

35) If you are lost, meet where you saw each other for the last time.

36) Never discuss the amount of the bill in a restaurant with those whom you treated.

37) No man is obliged to shake hands with another in the toilet or when leaving it.

38) When eating in a Japanese restaurant, never stir wasabi - let it dissolve. Place the sushi sideways in the sauce.

39) Never get involved in a conflict between a married couple.

40) Never stand in the left lane with the wheels turned to the left.

41) Even an unloaded weapon should not be pointed at a person.

42) If you manage to put on a suit, then the belt and boots should be monochromatic.

43) It's even inconvenient to speak, but - rip off the tag from the sleeve of your jacket.

44) NEVER THIN ANY MALT WHISKEY WITH COLA.

45) Never joke with government officials when they ask you formal questions like "Are you carrying a bomb?"

46) You should brush or at least rinse your comb before combing your freshly washed hair.

47) Don't wear fakes.

48) In a restaurant, always take an extreme pair of appliances for each next dish.

49) If in the first 15 minutes at the poker table you can't figure out who the sucker is, then it's you.

50) It is inappropriate to drink beer from a bottle, can or plastic if you have a glass at hand.

51) You have no right to ask a friend to help you with some nonsense (fix a computer, move things) if a friend earns more per hour than the corresponding professional.

52) There are no circumstances under which a man can drink strong alcoholic beverages. If it doesn't work, mix it up. Whiskey-cola is not the same as drinking whiskey with cola.

53) It is impolite to grumble about the quality, grade or high-quality of what you are being treated to.

54) Count your money, even if you take it from close friends.

55) It is forbidden to ask a friend "And when will you marry?" in the presence of his girlfriend.

56) If a dog attacks you, pretend to pick up a stone from the ground.

57) Take a hot shower before shaving to steam out your skin.

58) Do not undress before your partner during sex.

59) On the stairs, a man should go lower than a woman.

60) Always book a hotel room online, even if you are already in the hotel lobby.

61) After drinking, always drink plenty of regular water before bed.

62) THE LAST CIGARETTE FROM ANOTHER PACKAGE CANNOT BE TAKEN.

63) There are no situations in which two men can be simultaneously under the same umbrella.

64) Before calling with the question "Well, where are you?", Any person who is late should be given five minutes beyond the established time limit.

65) Three situations in which it is not necessary to let a woman forward: 1) an elevator; 2) the back seat of the car; 3) unfamiliar place.

66) Men do not go together to buy their own clothes.

67) Do not talk on your mobile in public transport for more than a minute.

68) At the confluence of two roads, always follow the sequence: you missed, you were missed.

69) Separate the fighting dogs by taking them by the hind legs and lifting them off the ground.

70) Even if all other topics are exhausted, never ask another man who he is according to the horoscope.

71) The winner must give at least one opportunity to win back.

72) NEVER FASTEN THE LOWER BUTTON ON THE JACKET.

73) Never force your phone on a girl when you meet.

74) When traveling in Russia, refuel when you have half a tank left.

75) Do not drive into the blind spot near heavy vehicles. She is on the right, at the level of the cockpit.

76) Always ask permission from a person before posting his photos on the Web, especially if they were taken at the final stage of a corporate party.

77) After finishing your meal, always put your knife and fork in parallel.

78) Always text or call a woman after first sex the next day.

79) Buckle up.

80) Cheating on his wife with her friend is a mess.

81) You cannot divide by zero.

82) It is impolite to comment on the actions of a person lifting or dragging weights, unless you are carrying this marble grand piano together.

83) Always turn off your mobile in the movies. Zadolbal already! They said a hundred times !!!

84) There is only one male way to pour beer - along the wall, tilting the glass.

85) When buying flowers, always take those with a longer stem. This means that they are recent and they have never been cut off.

86) When you meet a polite attitude on the road, be sure to say thank you to the emergency gang.

87) RULE OF THE HEAD: PRAISE PRIVATE, CHECK PRIVATE.

88) When armwrestling, always put your right foot forward.

89) In an unfamiliar city, go to the restaurant with the most people.

90) Never stand in line if your time isn't worth it. To do this, calculate once and for all how much you earn per hour, and correlate this amount with the time lost.

91) When you repost text to your blog, always try to find and indicate the source.

92) When quarreling, especially with a woman, try to use “I-messages” instead of “you-messages”: instead of “You are bored”, always say “I feel bored”, etc.

93) For light beer, take light food (pasta, fish, cheese), for dark - dark (fried meat).

94) The only person who has the right to watch porn with you is the woman you sleep with.

95) When paying a deposit, for a hotel or car, as well as shopping on the Internet, use a credit card, not a debit card.

96) Never lend to a loved one more than you are ready to give him.

97) Before a responsible medical procedure, ask at least three specialists for their opinion on the need for it.

98) If you put a woman in an unfamiliar car, remember the numbers, or at least pretend.

99) Do not comment on the appearance or character of the girl with whom your acquaintance was stupid to have a serious relationship.

100) GOLDEN RULE OF ETHICS: DO WITH OTHERS AS YOU WANT OTHERS TO DO WITH YOU